Sunday, December 02, 2007

A Storm Is Brewing (and we're all gonna die!)

For some reason, the news media are hyping storms with a kind of storm of their own. They didn't used get all worked up. Maybe it's a liability thing. When a big storm was coming, we just settled in and waited for it to come and then to pass. The lights would go out for a couple days and we'd call it good. Not now, though. It's all over the news and everyone is buzzing with "the big storm" talk. I may be proved wrong, but when I had had enough as the umteenth person came up to me and asked if I was ready for "the big storm," I turned to them so that I could see their eyes. I removed my glasses and sent my chin on a one inch dive so that the rest of my face could make a serious comment. I said, "Yeah. I'm ready. And do you know what's going to happen?" "No. What?," came the reply. "Nothing," I said before putting my glasses back on.

I hope I don't have to eat those words along with a half cord worth of splinters from the rotted top of that red alder in the front yard after it comes crashing through my living room windows.

The first of two big storms came through today. To my surprise--and delight--I didn't feel much of it. I went to the local airport weather report on Weather Underground and saw that it was blowing 48 mph with a peak gust of 78 mph. Nice. Top wind gust for the state took place on Cape Mears in Tillamook County---105 mph. I was vindicated on the first go-round.

The "big one" is scheduled to reach landfall sometime after midnight. We are expecting winds in the 80s. Just in case, I have filled 7 of those 5 gallon plastic buckets with toilet flushes, topped off all the plastic water bottles I could dig out of the recycle, and I did the laundry. So far, the power has only gone off twice, and very briefly both times.

The first two pictures were taken last week. This is Depoe Bay, "Smallest Harbor In The World," the sign says as you come into town before blinking and then realizing you have passed on through. They have a restaurant there called, "The Spouting Horn." It is named after what you are seeing in the pictures. A good high tide is all you need to send saltwater skyward when it all gets rammed into the narrowed channels that create the phenomenon.

I went out on my front deck to record what could be the last photographs of Gawpo. I went out there to say good bye because, according to the news, we are all going to die:

The mug was acquired in Cefalu, Sicily. Come to think of it, so was the Gawpo. But in Camporeale:

The Gawpo leaning back in smug repose, waiting for "the big one." In French, "the big one" is spelled G-A-D-O-T. See that red sweatshirt? That is Gawpo's favorite sweatshirt. He found it in a dumpster. True story. Once washed, it retained all its glorious stains thus consigning itself to the category of favorite. See that knit cap? Gawpo found that, too. Found it, in fact, the same day the pictures of the Spouting Horn were taken. The hat was wet. Once washed, it was good as new, thus consigning itself to Gawpo's newest favorite cap. True story.

As I sit here this evening and type, I can't help feeling a bit apprehensive. It was blowing pretty hard today. It was noisy outside. Right now though, it is eerily quiet. It is....well, how shall I put this: It is "eye" quiet.



At Sunday, December 2, 2007 at 8:39:00 PM PST , Blogger lime said...

but the big question is, did yougo the the grocery store and get all the milk, bread and toilet paper your exploder can carry?

that's what they do here when the big one is going to hit and make us all dead. we may be dead but dammit we got milk, bread, and toilet paper.

At Sunday, December 2, 2007 at 9:03:00 PM PST , Blogger Candace said...

Ooooh Eye quiet is scary. That IS Sofa King funny about our titles. ^_^ We are joined at the brain cell. Not to imply that we have but one (and share it to boot.) No, no, no!!

It is freakin' HOWLING outside here. Much like you with your fear of red alder toothpicks, I'm a little concerned about that giant moth-eaten (OK, bullet-riddled -- true story) oak tree out back. But as MuNKi pointed out to me just moments ago, it'll be harder for the wind to blow it down now that all the leaves are off. Whew. I think.

I'm going to go out on a limb and suggest that you mummify yourself in toilet paper in case the tree does decide to make a grand entrance. ^_^

At Sunday, December 2, 2007 at 10:21:00 PM PST , Blogger OC or Q said...

Water was a grand idea. How about food and bandages?

Hope you stay high-n-dry, and that your tree stays out and you stay in.

At Monday, December 3, 2007 at 4:26:00 AM PST , Blogger Bazza & Wifey said...

I've got to say you're looking mighty cool in those pictures Gawpo, you have a very relaxed "give it your worst" air about you. Oh and is it wise for lime to mention toilet paper and exploding in the same sentence (I've just noticed she mentions the "big one" as well) aah, toilet humour, you can't beat it (well it would be pretty messy, oh Bazza, stop it)

At Monday, December 3, 2007 at 5:15:00 AM PST , Blogger Sheila said...

Gotta luv a snappy dresser..!
I still prefer you in the safari suit with the turban.
The wind blew through here last night, and about 3 am I'm sure I saw Toto go sailing past the bedroom window. DOB read your last post yesterday and couldn't sleep...not because of the weather, but he was having flash backs of sister Della Rosa..!

At Monday, December 3, 2007 at 8:36:00 AM PST , Blogger armalicious said...

Ugh. I have to say that all the hype about the "big storms" drives me crazy! It was all they could talk about Friday night. They cancelled our Christmas parade because it was going to be so bad with "100% chance of freezing rain". There was some freezing rain and everything was frosted over Saturday morning, but honestly it was nothing to poop your pants over.

They do this in Tornado season, too. Ever since that one tornado came through and completed massacred a town by my old high school, they freak out whenever there is a chance of a tornado. it's life. It happens. Get over it and move on.

And that is my weather rant for the day. Grazie.

p.s. your mug (both the drinking kind and your face) are super cute!

At Monday, December 3, 2007 at 9:09:00 AM PST , Blogger Ps said...

Rule no.1: Gawpo is always right.
Rule no.2: If Gawpo is wrong refer rule no.1.
Rule no.3: Storm is a storm only as per Gawpo's definition.A storm can be anything Gawpo wants it to be (Or not be)
Shall watch this space for more Gawpoisms! :-)

At Monday, December 3, 2007 at 2:39:00 PM PST , Blogger Scarlet said...

I think the storm should be afraid of YOU! ;) And by the way, don't leave us hanging, where'd the Gawpo get the jeans?

At Monday, December 3, 2007 at 2:48:00 PM PST , Blogger Claire said...

You look like you're going to lay the smackdown on that ol' storm. Hey there's Gawpo, kickin' ass and taking names standing there in his dumpster divin' best!
Here in sunny Norcal, it was a little bit windy and all the local pussies got out their heavy all weather gear. heh, heh

At Monday, December 3, 2007 at 2:50:00 PM PST , Blogger Claire said...

oh, yeah I forgot -motorcycle suicide guy's memorial got blown all over hell and tarnation. Would someone please move on and take that stuff away now? fer cryin' out loud...
Go Wildcats!

At Monday, December 3, 2007 at 4:40:00 PM PST , Blogger mindy said...

don't die gawpo.. i'd miss you too much.

At Monday, December 3, 2007 at 6:28:00 PM PST , Blogger Jay said...

We got the first of many winter storms here - the weather man assures us this will be the worst one in 15 years.

At Monday, December 3, 2007 at 9:25:00 PM PST , Blogger Gawpo said...

LIMERS: Turns out we ARE all dead. We got an 88 at the courthouse and up in Lincoln City they clocked a whopping 125mph gust!!! But milk and bread is great when you're dead!

CANDACIA: I have taken your advice. That's why I sound so muffled here. Our shared brain cell is energized by the high windages we endure. Wave energy ain't got nuthin' on the shared Candacian-Gapowean brain cell. w00t! The barometer is rising (along with the swollen-unto-flood-stage rivers) and I can feel it in my----trunk.

OC or Q: We ain't got no flowing lava here, but wind is the paper that covers rock. You should see the river. Wow. I couldn't get home tonight on the regular road leading out of Siletz. Had to take Sam's crick. And the power just came back on. w00t! All the leaves are----gone. And the sky is gray. I should go for a walk, on this winter's day....etc. xo

BAZZA et WIFEY: You and Limers can lay all the crappy toilet humor you want. My face is flushed, but I can handle it. Oh, Gawpo, quit already. Ha!

SHEILER, MOB: Hope you and DOB got some sleep. That Toto image was to die for. And I need to find me a turban and safari suit, STAT. Can you imagine what I could do with the picturer in that get-up. Ha!

ARMALICIOUS: Et tu! Stormage even there?! Croly Hap. But the biggest story of all is----IT'S YOU, IT'S YOU!!! YOU ARE THERE!!! I have been thinking intensely of you. Ahhhh. I feel good. Hello dear and sweet friend. Got any prodigal stories you care to share? Lemmie gno....

And "aw, shucks" on the p.s. you left me there. Blush, blush, sigh...

PS: You are a quick study on the rules, my dear. Yes. All the way 'round. That paltry 125mph hour gust was a mere zephyr of a breeze. What's all the hype about? Even that huge Douglas Fir that blew over the high voltage feeder lines and completely blocked my way home tonight didn't stop El Ka-Gawpo. I'm home now, aren't I? Yes, I am. And as soon as I got here, guess what else happened.....THE POWER CAME BACK ON. See? The rules. It's all about the rules.

SCARLETA: I was hoping you would ask. That particular pair of denims came from a shopping venture of my own and were more than very reasonable. Yes, I do have the designer Levi Silvers in the drawer. But these are (no matter how you feel about Mr. Walton) Wal*Mart specials. And I bought them with my own money. (I love when kids say that.)

CLAIRE: I can just see you and hear you saying that in your best "let the babies have their way" voice. Nice. Wooses, all. You---the biken' babe that you are---would snap them like toothpicks. And then pick your teeth with them. And then swallow what you picked out. And then burp them back out. You go, Mama!

CLAIRE: Ha! And a more fitting distribution could not be had at the hand of any other storm. Take the hint, People. Get a Kuh-LUE!


MINDANCE: Okay. I am back. I was only dead but for a little while. I don't even smell bad. Getting dead ain't all it's cracked up to be. Heck, I even rolled away my own stone. Feel better? I sure do.

JAY: FUT THE WUCK IS IT WITH ALL THE STORMAGE!?!? Sheesh. They are everywhere. Like rats. We need to go on a storm hunt and kick some storm ASS, I tell ya. I will lean back and fwap my chest while saying, "Bring it! Bring it! C'mon. Bring it!" Can't you just see that?

At Tuesday, December 4, 2007 at 6:31:00 PM PST , Blogger Candace said...

Trunk! Bwahahahahaha!!! ^_^

You pachyderm, you.

At Wednesday, December 5, 2007 at 9:17:00 AM PST , Blogger julie said...

I hope you escaped the worst of it... it was bad enough inland.

At Wednesday, December 5, 2007 at 1:06:00 PM PST , Blogger OC or Q said...

Well, how'd the storm leave you? Here on leeward Oahu we were left without power for about 7 hours. We played cribbage and ate cheese sandwiches.


At Wednesday, December 5, 2007 at 2:32:00 PM PST , Blogger AnnieElf said...

Hey J. I think you lost your cell phone for a while too. Don and I had the misfortune of having to travel to Oregon this weekend for George's funeral. Please remember George in your prayers. I called a few times just to touch base with you but the circuits were "out", "busy", something. Anyway, we started back around 1:30 Sunday after Mass and breakfast with the kids. Hit wind and rain that was so frantic, especially with all those 4% and 6% grades between Portland and Medford, that Mary even got a Rosary out of me. Include in that a mental alphabetical litany to every Saint I could think of (couldn't come with anything for u, y, or z) Overnighted in Medford, bought chains at WalMart the next morning just in case Mt. Shasta was having a tantrum, (he wasn't) and headed home. Pulled back into Turlock about 4:45. So, just your basic white knuckle weekend for folks not used to "weather". We even had snow on Saturday at the funeral and interment.

At Wednesday, December 5, 2007 at 3:01:00 PM PST , Blogger Gawpo said...

CANDACIA: Hey, you know you can tusk me with your life!

JEWLES: If only I could be home when there is daylight. Honest----I haven't been able to see what happened yet. I have had to come in for work at 5am two mornings in a row and haven't seen it.

Oooops! Gotta run....more later....G

At Wednesday, December 5, 2007 at 3:03:00 PM PST , Blogger Gawpo said...

OC or Q: Storms EVERYWHERE!!! Even in Paradise. That ain't right. I still haven't been able to survey. Tomorrow is my Friday. I can go up on the roof on Friday. No leaks yet, though.

ANNIE: I have not had any kind of a break to call you for so many days! I went to your page quickly, but duty has me spread thin. I will call you.

xo, G

At Wednesday, December 5, 2007 at 3:45:00 PM PST , Blogger AnnieElf said...

p.s. Forgot to say, glad to read that you are safe and, I like the duds. You are very Red Hat Society with your colors. Just reversed though. Totally guy thang I'm sure. Don says you are no doubt on round the clock duty. Breathe when you can. Just glad to know that you didn't slide down a hill.

At Wednesday, December 5, 2007 at 5:23:00 PM PST , Anonymous Don - Annielf's Other said...

Hi Gawpo. A storm is a storm. It has effects; some worse then others. My favorite was back in the Midwest, when I was a kid. We had ice storms from rain then freezing weather. The effects were a beautiful winter wonderland, with ice over everything. The down side was down power lines and slick roads. Take care and God bless.

At Wednesday, December 5, 2007 at 10:16:00 PM PST , Anonymous Brooke said...

Glad to hear you made it through the storm and didn't get dead. I'd be sad if you got dead. I called dad last night and I guess my step-sis's house had been without electricity for about 20 hours. She lives right near dad's house so you know where that is. Take care! :)

At Thursday, December 6, 2007 at 3:41:00 AM PST , Blogger somewhere joe said...

Storm, storm, rife and rainy
fall instead on Richard Cheney

(it's called imprecatory prayer)

You look so kewl in you dumpster togs.

iQuiet. It's new! Never needs recharging (there's no battery). It has 0 gigabytes of memory. And it's environmentally friendly; it never wears out.

At Thursday, December 6, 2007 at 8:17:00 PM PST , Blogger Gillian @ Indigo Blue said...

Eye quiet, would that be the eye of the category 5?
When we saw Twister for the first time, any time something crazy went down, we ranked it F4, or
Silly. Gawpo, don't die. We haven't even shared a cup of Joe yet or anything in person-like.
Come on! Wait until AFTER we meet in person.
Actually, wait a long time, you'd be missed too much!

At Friday, December 7, 2007 at 9:10:00 AM PST , Blogger somewhere joe said...

You and Gawpo are going to share a cup of me in person? Am I invited?

At Friday, December 7, 2007 at 11:01:00 AM PST , Blogger Gillian @ Indigo Blue said...

With a dollop of foam and extra cinnamon.
You are indeed invited!

At Friday, December 7, 2007 at 11:37:00 PM PST , Blogger Gawpo said...

ANNIE FROM TURLOCK: If I don't get called to work tomorrow, then tomorrow will be the first opportunity to see my property in the daylight since Sunday the 2nd. I have had to leave before light and get home after light. I will climb up on the roof in the morning to see how it did. Sorry I couldn't call you when you were up here. Prayers for Charles and all connected.

DON: All things encased in ice is not fun. We have that rarely here. I didn't know what black ice was until I moved here. You too, good and loving man---take care. And again, so sorry for the loss.

BWOOKIE: And still, some are without power. Toledo got theirs back fairly quickly, but it was Waldport and Yachats that went for about three days in the dark. I was SO LUCKY. And no, I didn't get dead. Yet. Not from this one, anyway. But a woman did get dead when she ignored all the other motorists stopping for the water running across the road. They say she disappeared "just like that" and has yet to be found. Sad, that.

SOMEWHRE JOE: Yes, I guess that is what that would be called. But hey, whatever works.

Thanks. I work hard at the dress code for the damned. I find it redeeming.

So get iQuiet today. What's that I hear? Hey---it's nothing.

BLUE TSG: Well, apparently what I was hearing was the Eye Of The Tiger.

Blue, don't you know that if you had ranked it F11, you could have viewed it full screen?

I promise: We will share at least a gallon of Joe, at his house, before I get dead.

SOMEWHERE JOE: Of course you are invited. How else could we have you? (oh, my...)

BLUE TSG: And maybe some chicory?

Chicory, Dickery, leave that alone, Joe!

At Saturday, December 8, 2007 at 9:55:00 PM PST , Blogger Dan said...

Hmmmmm, I wonder if you're still there? Are you? Or did you blow away? Your blog didn't blow away. But then it wouldn't because it's on a server at Google, most likely in Washingston state, right? Oh, but maybe Google got blown away too?

At Sunday, December 9, 2007 at 10:56:00 AM PST , Blogger Cindrarella said...

Hello? Where are you?

Come vote at TGQDC!

First let me know you are alive!

At Sunday, December 9, 2007 at 2:36:00 PM PST , Blogger Gawpo said...

DAN: Yes, the storm killed nearly all of us in the Pacific Northwest. Including many parts of Google. I would elaborate, but I have to go and let Cindra know that I didn't get dead. Thanks for checking in.

CHEENDRUH!: I finally got a day off. Three of them, in fact. Hunckering down on my hill. I need to go into town soon. I will call you.

Headed over to LBVWRDC or whatever it's called, to vote.


(Poop on your head! Poop on your head!)

At Monday, December 10, 2007 at 12:07:00 PM PST , Blogger somewhere joe said...

Chicory Dicory Dock
Kiedis put his in a sock
they made a big hit
when the shoe didn't fit
they called it alternative rock

At Monday, December 10, 2007 at 12:14:00 PM PST , Blogger Gawpo said...

SOMEWHERE JOE: Okay, I do care who you are, and that's just funny.

Were your fingertips burning? As you were typing that comment, I was taking some self portraits with my new picturer. You chimed in after my last shot. has lots to say about the D40 and megapixels and tons of useful info for ams such as moi. Click on "Recommended Cameras."

At Monday, December 10, 2007 at 1:51:00 PM PST , Blogger Nessa said...

It's the big one, Weezy, I mean, Gawpy. You still there or did you blow away? Gaawwwpppyyyeeee?

In the last picture, you look ready to kick some stormin' ass, baby.

At Tuesday, December 11, 2007 at 4:09:00 AM PST , Blogger Pam Aries said...

Wooooo!!! Merry Hooty HOO!! Are you still alive? Boy..I can relate to the OVERkill of weather news..around here one raindrop causes a frenetic weathermen frenzy of freak out-ness! ha! SO..I guess I should buy some storm gear before I make the big move,huh? look cute in your trashy treasure sweater!@ heh heh

At Tuesday, December 11, 2007 at 4:54:00 AM PST , Blogger somewhere joe said...

Did you ever get that VR lens we talked about?

At Tuesday, December 11, 2007 at 10:17:00 AM PST , Blogger Gillian @ Indigo Blue said...

My god the two you you are pure hilarity.
I am making a special podcast meme, just for you two. I will then be tagging the both of you to participate.
I know, it's a nail biter!

At Tuesday, December 11, 2007 at 10:19:00 AM PST , Blogger Gillian @ Indigo Blue said...

...and if I'm not mistaken, is Pammy from Charleston soon to be from Portland, hitting on you-bloggie style?
Don't confuse that with another rhymes-with style, G. Keep it in the sock ol' buddy.
Winking at cha madly-Bleux

At Tuesday, December 11, 2007 at 11:12:00 AM PST , Blogger Catnapping said...

yummy. red is my favorite colour. red is HOT.

At Wednesday, December 12, 2007 at 10:18:00 AM PST , Blogger Logophile said...

I survived, did you survived?
I could totally picture that glasses maneuver TEE HEE
you so crazy

At Wednesday, December 12, 2007 at 2:02:00 PM PST , Blogger Enemy of the Republic said...

Rumor has it that we are getting a storm to end all storms this weekend. But here in Philly, they can't handle a half inch of rain, or even snow flurries. I will watch and hope I don't have to be anywhere.

At Thursday, December 13, 2007 at 4:53:00 AM PST , Blogger Pam Aries said...

Ya'll is crazeeeee! ~~~~waving at you Mz. Blue~~~~

At Saturday, December 15, 2007 at 8:04:00 PM PST , Blogger Candace said...

Croly Hap! Did you actually expire in the storm??

At Sunday, December 16, 2007 at 12:06:00 PM PST , Blogger Gawpo said...

NESSIE: Gawpie pretty much got HIS ass kicked by that storm. But I fared much better than thousands of others. Dumb storm. Sheesh.

PAM AIRES: Hootyhoo back! I think some rain gear would be in order. Storm gear consists of staying indoors in that stuff.

SOMEWHERE JOE: I am but a single click away for the purchase. Letting it hover. Letting it soak. I think.....I think I'll....I think I'm gonna hit confirm.

Will let you know via the computer monitor.

BLUE TSG: Crikkies!!!! I am taken away from the blog scene most of the time these days. Dang. I'd better get my buns over there!

BLUE TST: You did say bloggie-style, right? Oh, I just read that part where it says not to confuse it with-----foggie-style.

NATCAPPING: Grrrrr, Baby! Grrrrrrr!!!

PHOGOLILE: I did survived. I am glad you survived. We are survivors. I peer over my glasses to make that point.

ENEMY OTR: I apologize for being less than contemporary, but do please keep your powder dry and endure the weather with bright spirits.

Hi, Pammers.

CANDACIA: That sockcucker tried to lay the smack down on 'ole Gawpo, but he did survive. "He's OKAY!"

At Monday, December 17, 2007 at 7:14:00 PM PST , Blogger Cheesy said...

Are we all still dead?? lol... Enjoying your pictures very much!
You happen to be in my most favorite part of this state!


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